


pessimistic

by Undertale_Writing_Challenges



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Bad Jokes, Bad Puns, Deja Vu, Drinking, Fontcest, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I just had this fanfiction idea that popped into my head, M/M, MM, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Papyrus Needs A Hug, Papyrus-centric, Rating May Change, References to Undertale Genocide Route, Resets, SO, Sad Papyrus, Sans Remembers Resets, TIME FOR A WILD RIDE. I literally have no clue what I'm doing, alchohol, author finally sort of knows where she's going, damn it sans, in a dream, sans is sick of your shit frisk, sans' broken promises, someone help this tol bean, they aren't bad they're humerus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2018-12-12 00:43:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11725968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Undertale_Writing_Challenges/pseuds/Undertale_Writing_Challenges
Summary: pes·si·mismnouna tendency to see the worst aspect of things or believe that the worst will happenPapyrus dies, and wakes up in his bed. He feels pretty lucky that it was just a dream.Until it happens again.





	1. Chapter 1

He wakes up with a jolt, eyes focusing in the dark room

_(Dark? No. It's morning. The alarm clock woke him up.)_

Why can't he see? He rubs at his eyes, feeling the starts of a headache pounding at his skull. The remainder of his dream claws annoyingly behind his eyes, memories of dust, snow, and a human. Sans warning him not to--

Sans.

His brother. He feels the urge to jump out of his bed and shake Sans awake and clutch him close, sobbing to him that he was okay, that he was alive, and that he'd never leave him.

But.

It was just a dream. He's fine, Sans is fine, and there is no human. There hasn't been for years, and there won't be one as terrifying as... Them.

He stretches, finally moving to turn the alarm clock that had been screeching at him for the past few minutes. He's fine.

* * *

 

"SANS! YOU LAZYBONES, IT'S TIME TO GET UP!"  
Waking up after a RESET is never fun. Countless timelines flickering through your head all at once, memories pounding marks into the back of your skull until you've memorized every pattern, every script, every path. He sits up. So fast he nearly knocks into his brother who is still trying to shake him awake. He feels sick.

"AS MUCH AS I APPRECIATE YOUR ENTHUSIASM, PLEASE REFRAIN FROM HITTING ME IN THE SKULL." Papyrus had reared away from him, letting go of him in favor of posing with his hands on his hips, looking at him with mock scold on his face. He misses his hands on him. He feels as though he'll float away without Papyrus' strong grip to ground him.

He _is_ sick.

"sorry, bro," he shrugged, posture slacking as he slipped into the role he's played for years "i guess i got a little a- _head_ of myself there."

"IT'S FINE, BROTHER, I'M SURE YOU--" Sans' grin grows to Cheshire cat levels as Papyrus registers the pun. "I WILL IGNORE THAT," He feels a little disappointed. Papyrus' reactions are what makes it all worthwhile. Maybe that's why he's shutting him down. "REGARDLESS, BREAKFAST IS READY."

"aw, sweet. what's for breakfast?" Spaghetti.

"SPAGHETTI," Like always. "LIKE ALWAYS."

"you're right. it was a no- _brainer._ " Sometimes he asks just to crack that joke. Sometimes he asks because he wants to know that Papyrus is here, and fine, and himself.

"AGH, SANS! STOP WITH THE JOKES!"

"but i thought they were _humerus_?"

"SANS, THIS IS NOT FUNNY. YOU ARE MOCKING MY CRAFT!"

"sorry, you're right. it took a lot of _spine_ to say that."

He loses it when Papyrus throws his hands in the air and stomps out of his room. He falls out of his bed in pure, unbridled laughter, and he's reminded of why his bed is so low to the ground.

Good ol' Papyrus. The one constant in this Hell he actually welcomes. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a storyline is finally established, in which a promise is broken, and in which Sans is depressed as usual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter was.. more or less a test chapter? I wanted to get into the style of writing Sans and Papyrus like this. I'm usually writing filthy fics, some fluff and angst is so far left field. So, hopefully, the following chapters will be longer. It's nice to finally continue this fic. 
> 
> I've no idea how long this'll be, or where it's going to go. We'll find out together. It'll be a surprise. I might do some audience participation too...
> 
> One thing I have decided is that this story will focus mainly around Papyrus

Even though he knew it was a dream, Papyrus still felt sort of  _off_ the rest of the day. He couldn't explain it, but everyone he talked to gave him a sickening sense of déjà vu. It felt like he'd already lived through this day somehow; like his soul was a few minutes into the future but his brain was in the present. But that's just  _silly,_ right? Monsters can't traverse time! ...can they?

He was just having an off day. There was no possible way he's experienced all of this already. Just his nightmare getting to him, that's all.

On the bright side, training with Undyne had been surprisingly easy. He'd manage to dodge all of her attacks, even though his soul lurched and his head spun with every hit that barely grazed him. Even Undyne was impressed! That is until she upped the ante and, all of a sudden, Papyrus wasn't any good.

He'd felt bad, like he'd somehow wronged his Captain. But Undyne was proud of him, and that made him happy. Maybe she's finally seeing that he's great enough to join her ranks?! He was very conflicted walking home that evening, torn between feeling excited and feeling guilty. 

 

Regardless of how he was feeling, he still had obligations. His brother still hadn't returned home, and it was well past dinner! Lazybones probably fell asleep at his station again! At least, Papyrus doesn't have to have any kind of déjà vu when it comes to his brother. He was always so predictable! For once, Papyrus welcomes that. 

But Sans hadn't been at his station, to his surprise. Even though he's worried about his brother, he can't help the sudden feeling of giddiness that flies through him at that realization. Things were going back to normal, Papyrus hopes he'll never have to feel that sensation of confusion and fear laying heavy in his soul again. For the first time that day, he finally knows how to feel. Irritated.  _("SANS, YOU INSUFFERABLE LAZY BONES!")_

So he sets off to the only other place Sans could be. Grillby's. The  _grease pit._ Papyrus hates it when he goes there. Mostly because it isn't healthy, but also kind of because he's sort of maybe jealous? He bristles at his own thoughts. He's not  _jealous._ It's just... What's so bad about The Great Papyrus' cooking? He makes great spaghetti that's as healthy as it is delicious! Grillby just lets him drink out of the ketchup bottle. Sans could do that at home, when Papyrus isn't around to scold him. He's pretty sure he does anyway!

Papyrus is more than a little upset by the time he makes it to the restaurant. It's his own fault, really. His thoughts always race ahead of him, making him think of the worst possible things. He'd somehow ended up thinking what it would be like if Sans left him.  _Hah._ That would never happen! ...right? He shakes his head and braces himself for the smell before he pushes open the door. He feels like he's punched in the face by the sheer change in atmosphere. What's worse is how the bar nearly silences when he walks in, all heads turning to him before--

_"Oooh, Sans! Your ride's here!"_   
_"Funs over guys, Paps got impatient,"_   
_"Sans~ You're in trouble now~"_

The skeleton in question snorts before moving to turn in his seat, and Papyrus makes a show of crossing his arms. He's  _annoyed_ with Sans, remember? He's got to show him that. Sans faces him, bottle in hand and-- Papyrus' soul freezes. That wasn't a  _ketchup_ bottle.

"h-hey, paps."

He was  _drunk._

In an instant, Papyrus goes from faux annoyment to true betrayal. His hands fall to his sides and he glowers at him, willing his face not to show his real feelings. He can tell by the flush on Sans' face that this wasn't his first drink. He probably wasn't planning on it to be the last. 

"did i -  _hic -_  miss curfew?" Sans promised Papyrus he'd never drink again. 

"YOU MISSED DINNER," His voice is loud and rougher than usual and it cuts through the silence of the room like a knife. He sees Sans visibly recoil from it. "BUT I CAN SEE YOU CLEARLY HAVE BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN EAT." Sans' eyes shrink, before he glances down at the half-empty bottle in his hand. Good. He understands why Papyrus is upset then. "DON'T STAY TOO LATE, AT LEAST." 

The bar was so silent you could hear a pen drop. Everyone was staring at Papyrus in shock and confusion. He knows what they were expecting. They've seen him come here many times, heard him argue with his brother to come home, and had even seen him rip Sans away from his stool and throw him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. They were expecting Sans to leave with Papyrus, as he always does. But not this time. Instead--

Papyrus turns on his heels and leaves.

* * *

 

 

He's not sure what he was expecting. Sans to follow him, maybe. Or at least to be home within the next few hours. He doesn't come back that night, and somehow that hurts Papyrus even more. He knows Sans isn't okay, knows that he's never really been  _okay._ He knows that's why Sans used to drink ( _D_ _oes drink,_ he corrects himself), and maybe Papyrus wouldn't have been so hurt if Sans hadn't  _promised_ him. Sans  _never_ breaks his promises, not the ones he makes to him at least. And that's how he knows Sans isn't okay, because he  _broke_ his promise. That's why it hurts so much. Instead of coming to him, Sans goes off and gets drunk and breaks his promise. It's just not  _fair,_ because Papyrus would tell Sans anything.  _It's not fair_ because it doesn't work the other way around. Sans doesn't tell him anything, ignores him and goes off and drinks his problems away, but still expects Papyrus to tell him what's wrong. 

 

Papyrus stays awake that night, laying in bed with his favorite book in his lap. He stays awake, waiting for Sans to read to him, to hug him, to tell him it's okay and he's sorry. He stays awake until he starts to cry. And he cries himself to sleep that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you ever had a really bad sense of déjà vu that just made you stop talking? I've felt like I've somehow seen something happen, or heard someone say it before. Like I can recall vividly experiencing it before. But that's not possible?
> 
> Déjà vu is one of the weirdest experiences and it's really hard to capture. If you've ever had a feeling like that, comment down below! I want to know if you guys experience it the same way as I do.
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr  
> https://undertale-writing-challenges.tumblr.com/


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